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How Do You Trust the Same Eyes That Once Lied? - Gita on Second Chances
Times Life | June 17, 2025 4:39 AM CST

It’s strange, isn’t it? How the same voice that once made your heart soften can suddenly make your guard go up. How someone’s presence can feel like both home and hazard. They come back—not always with grand gestures, sometimes with quiet words: “I’ve changed.” “I was lost.” “I didn’t realise back then.” And just like that, you’re standing at a crossroad that isn’t easy. You want to believe in second chances. You want to believe people grow. But you also remember.

What Does It Actually Mean to Give Someone a Second Chance?
We often mistake forgiveness for return. But they’re not the same. The Gita doesn’t ask us to hold on to pain. It doesn’t glorify resentment. But it also doesn’t say: “Forget the past just because someone regrets it.” Krishna, in his quiet but firm wisdom, tells Arjuna: Do what aligns with your dharma—your inner truth, your deeper purpose. Not what is easiest. Not what is emotionally convenient. But what is right, even if it’s hard.
So when someone who once broke your trust says they’re no longer that person—pause. Not because you’re cold or unforgiving, but because wisdom requires observation, not impulse. Ask yourself:

  • Have they changed, or are they just uncomfortable with your distance?
  • Is this growth or just guilt?
  • And more importantly, if you let them back in, are you doing it from strength—or fear of being alone?

The Gita’s Reminder: Not Every Good Intention Deserves a Place in Your Life
People evolve. That’s real. But evolution doesn’t always mean re-entry. In the Gita, Arjuna doesn’t walk away from the battlefield just because his enemies are his own kin. Love exists, but dharma is still duty. What does that mean for us? It means that someone’s goodness, or their change, or their apologies—however genuine—don’t automatically mean they belong in your life again.
They may have learned. That’s wonderful. But your peace isn’t the reward for their progress. Sometimes, closure is not about returning. It’s about understanding: “I see you’ve grown. And I’ve grown, too—just in a direction where your presence no longer fits.”

Trust Isn’t Blind. It’s Earned. Slowly
If you choose to trust again, let it be because your heart is anchored, not because it’s aching. The Gita doesn’t teach blind faith. Krishna doesn’t ask Arjuna to believe without question. He explains. He reasons. He invites Arjuna to think for himself. That’s what trust should be. Not a leap, but a choice. Informed, thoughtful, slow.
Let people show you they’ve changed. Not once. Not in words. But in consistent actions. In how they react when it’s no longer about impressing you. In how they show up when no one’s clapping. You can love someone. You can even forgive them. But trusting again? That’s a separate journey. One that deserves your full awareness.

Final Thought: Love With Eyes Open
Second chances are beautiful—but only when they come with truth, not illusion. The Gita doesn’t tell you to become cynical. It doesn’t say don’t love. It simply says: be aligned. Be awake. Be honest—with yourself, first. If their eyes once lied, and now they say they’ve changed, don’t rush to answer. Look within. Ask what you need, not just what you miss.
Because sometimes the kindest thing you can do for yourself is not to go back. But to move forward, gently, with love—for them, yes—but more importantly, for the person you’ve become in their absence. Let that be your dharma. Let that be your healing. And let that be enough.


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